Poet John Rice tells some great stories about space - as a storyteller, he has no compare - and these stormtroopers would make a great poem!
Utterly fearless, you roam the galaxy reciting poetry at everyone you meet.
When faced with the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal, you simply quoted Wordsworth. When serenading the beautiful sirens of Betelgeuse Four, you used the sonnets of Shakespeare. And when getting a stern telling-off from Lord Vader of the Sith, you responded with one of John Rice’s poems about leisure centres.

WHAT??? You brought my name into this? Do you have any idea what a stark, raving madman he is? He chokes people to death without even having to touch them! He’s completely bonkers in every way – and you brought him to my door???

Oh, what am I to do? I will dread the moment the Dark Lord appears at my front door, demanding that I come up with poetry about the Death Star. This will be forever on your head, oh bringer of doom to Cumbria. I am lost, life has no more meaning. Wait… what’s that? The door! He is here! I will meet my fate, but I might not return…



I’m back. Turns out he just wanted directions to the waterslide.

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